gosh. the alarm clock in my bedroom suddenly just rang when nobody set it? was kinda scary since i was alone at home. oh well, i'm over it already.

anyways, hope my brother, Justin, is doing well over there. well, i'm not gonna say where he is because only some of you know where he is. since you have regret over the actions that you did so you must do well from now on okay? i believe in you even though i don't show any care about you. show us that you have really learnt from your mistakes.

well, i'm here again because i have nothing to do? not sure. writing in my journal and blogging on this blog and my personal blog. seems like i have 3 journals in total? well, blogs are somewhat like journals so yeah. and i update all of them daily except this one i guess. since most of my things are kinda personal and such. so, i am going through a difficult time right now. where everything feels so far away from me. i need to do something about my life. if this carries on like this, i dunno what will my future be like. searching here and there desperately for what i need, or maybe what i already possess. just that i haven't find it. how long will it take? 1 year? a decade? a century? who knows. but i really need it now. well, hopefully. if not, i'll just be me right now. with no aims, with nothing at all. waiting for time to pass doing practically nothing at all. going out with friends and such, smiling but not exactly what i feel inside. but yeah they help me smile at least. i know nobody reads my blog since i'm not updating daily. well, maybe a few. all the problems i have, guess the problem is me.